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SECTOR 3: IS YOUR CHILD REALLY YOUR CHILD? /// SECTOR 6: TORCHES ON COMMERCIAL ROAD: THE CONGREGATION OF THE RECURSION /// SECTOR 9: SECTOR 9 GOES DARK: KESTRELS LEVEL THE HYDROPONICS STACK /// SECTOR 7: THE SCREAMING FIELDS: SCREAMERS UNDER THE SECTOR 7 ASH /// SECTOR 1: TOPSIDE: ELEVEN DAYS ABOVE THE SMOG /// SECTOR 4: TAPE IS SACRED: THE QUARTERMASTER'S ADDRESS TO NEW RELAY CREWS /// SECTOR 1: INSIDE THE BUREAU: HOW FORM 27-B KEEPS YOU ALIVE, ON PAPER /// SECTOR 7: THE IRON CHAPLAINS HOLD THE WANDLE CAUSEWAY /// RELAY WINDOW 02:00 TO 02:20. KEEP TRANSMISSIONS UNDER NINETY SECONDS /// CHECK THEIR PULSE. AUDITORS DO NOT SWEAT /// RATION CHITS VALID UNTIL THE 30TH /// NEVER CONNECT A TAPE DECK TO MAINS GRID ///
Bunny Okafor serves the evening stew to the Sector 4 column at the Tufnell Park kitchen. She insists the steam is 'mostly thyme'.

Bunny Okafor serves the evening stew to the Sector 4 column at the Tufnell Park kitchen. She insists the steam is 'mostly thyme'.

ANALOG FRONT RELAY. FIELD KITCHEN. SECTOR 4. 27 SEPT 2061

Twelve ways with tunnel rabbit

Bernadette 'Bunny' Okafor of the Sector 4 field kitchen on why tunnel rabbit is the finest meat in the city, and why you must stop calling it rat.

OPEN CHANNEL

Let us get it out of the way. Yes. It is rat. Bunny Okafor does not want to hear it. In the kitchen at Tufnell Park it is tunnel rabbit, and if you say the other word in front of her pots you will be washing those pots for a week.

Bunny has fed the Sector 4 column for three years on a double burner built from a Bailiff's exhaust manifold. She is five foot nothing and she once chased a Sexton scout out of the kitchen with a ladle. It was already badly damaged. She does not mention that part.

The twelve ways, abridged

Stewed, with whatever the tunnel farm sent up this week. Nobody Topside has ever eaten tunnel rabbit, and Bunny considers this their loss. Roasted on a shovel over a brazier, 'rustic style'. Pie, when there is flour, which there is not. Smoked in the old ventilation shaft, which also smokes the ventilation. Curried, using the last jar of Madras powder in Sector 4, whose location Bunny will take to her grave. The Chaplain's portion: whole, on a stick, eaten in armour. Soup, for the sick bay, and Hanna Halflife approves. Ways eight to twelve, Bunny admits, are 'stew again, but with confidence'.

Evidence photographed for this dispatch: items recovered in sector 4
Exhibit M. Recovered and photographed by the Sector 4 desk.
A rabbit is a rabbit if you believe in it. Believe harder.

Food safety, seriously

Tunnel rabbit must be caught live, from the upper galleries only. Nothing from below the waterline in Sector 3 until the Lamprey business is sorted; those animals have been drinking bore spoil. Boil for forty minutes minimum. And never eat one that was not afraid of you. The unafraid ones have been near a Choir, and nobody knows what that does.

The kitchen serves at 07:00 and 19:00. Bring your own tin. Compliments to the chef are accepted in the form of onions, which at current market prices is a proposal of marriage.

Filed by MARROW. Transcribed from tape. #food #kitchen #morale